Match Reports

Two more from Moore!!

Banbridge 2nds 5 – 3 North Down 2nds

Our new Mr. Miyagi. We’ll call him keeper X for now for bureaucratic reasons. Fantastic!

The usual silent cold blooded efficiency from Andrew Boyd!

Irwin bellowing like a wounded Mastodon at the back for the last time this season!

The Milk Magnate making up for a first half that had him marked as a Bann 5th columnists and a likely collaborator in some sub-continent betting scam!

A stonking MOTM performance from mild-mannered psycho Alistair Hunter.

A return to full-involvement by my favourite naturist and Renaissance Man rascal Stephen Dalzell!

Paul Work (Adgey) imperious in a scampish sort of way in midfield with goal scoring on his mind!

Jordan Linter – the North Down Wolverine returns to front-line action!

Scott Moore rediscovers his Goalatolla!

Mark Shannon marks the bejezuus out of the Ban sweeper – under orders as opposed to the usual “WFT are you doing Buddha?! Defend! DEEEFEEEND!!!”.

Gordy Brown (what happened to the McTavish Albert bit? I was looking forward to having it predica-thingy-ma-jigged) – The Whippet! He makes ScoMo look like he’s on a disability scooter.

Matthew James (formally Matt Wilson, what has he been up to?!) returned and managed to wheeze his way through laying down fifteen or twenty minutes of suppressing fire while Dalzell, Tatey and Hunter had their coffee breaks.

And finally Adam Tate. Engage reverse stick touch! Engage prolonged engagement with the enemy! But the universe demands balance! For every Tatey plus there must be a minus. 4-3 down but in the ascendancy against the self-proclaimed “2nd best team in the league” with a couple of minutes to go. What a time for the Tatey goal-prevention prevention (work it out logic fans) drugs to wear off. I blame myself. Enforcing a “20 minute minimum time between visits to the bench for Tatey” rule interrupted his medication to the point of two stroke-inducing episodes of the between the ears variety in front of goal in closing minutes of the game. He looked like he was having one and I felt like one was coming on watching it.

Flip me boys where were these performances earlier in the season?! We got beat and we’re probably for the chop but we’re going down fighting.

Next week the cup! At home! We demand support!

Thanks to Jim Patterson for supplying justice again! And thanks to Andy Walls for providing Jim Patterson.

Beat that for “!” count.

Report by Stevie Magee unassisted from beyond!!

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