Seconds fall to Garvey seconds

North Down 2nds 0 – 9 Lisnagarvey 2nds

The game? Freshly relegated North Down 2nds vs Lisnagarvey 2nds – game 2 PME (Post Mockey Era). The weather? Changeable. The performance? Pants.

Out go Donnan, Bailie, Wilson, Dalzell and Glover. In come Chris Speers(just in the nick of time), Magee (comeback No.1024), the newly speed-aware father to be Job Seeker Steven McGimpsey (congrats on one and maybe two of those Stevo), man-flu survivor goalkeeperand last but not least light-weight-racing-ferret Mockey replacement Phil Dorian. Out go heroic crazy-gang cup wins in comes typical league debacle.

Who is to blame for this grim situation? The “revolving door, hands-up who can play” selection policy? Perhaps. The fact that…balls to this!…let’s stick together and point the finger outwards rather than inwards. It’s Garvey, that’s who is to blame! What, with their matching kit, their great hair and makeup, their passing, running, scoring, defending and their insistence on supplying the match ball. A ball, I might add, that North Down failed to cope with in every conceivable way. Stopping it? Forget it. Passing it? Joke. Keeping it out of our net? Pfft! Putting it in theirs? LOL man! L.O.L. We didn’t even get to nick it at the end of the game – they took it home with them.

A 9-0 pounding with very few redeeming features other than we kept playing unlike this season’s darkest hour up at Annadale. Go back and read the report – strong stuff not for the weak hearted.

Our only defence was to part like the Red Sea and hope that the diseased Monty in nets would be able to get close enough to infect the intruder and lay him low before he could shoot. Team scientist Gordy Brown pointed out that it takes a bit longer than that for these things to take effect and maybe some sort of tackle would be more effective. But, like a DUP supplied Minister for Health we laugh at science and took no notice. Epic fail.

On a cheery note we’ve only to play them twice more in the next couple of weeks. Ponder that over your GnTs.  Ho hum.

Report by Stevie Magee.