Weakened seconds lose at Loughmoss

The Donald is en-route to the White House, Hilly is heading for the conference circuit, dear old Lenny Cohen is gone and yet, reason not withstanding, Gary Barlow lives on. The world is a dark, confusing place where not much makes sense. Just like the mens 2s.

With the bulk of the 2s squad holed up in various NHS establishments ranging from Knee Reconstruction, through Sprog Extraction and on to the Man Flu Palliative Care Unit it was always going to be a tough old day up at our youth-pilfering nemeses Annadale.

Fear of the Irwinator can only drive men so far and after a heroic 11 man effort the whole understaffed operation collapsed in a flurry of goals in the last quarter ending in a 7-0 hosing by an outfit we are fully expecting to stick it to on the return leg.

Before the gin (Plymouth this week) warms in the glass, let’s have a look at that ‘0’ in ‘7-0’ and wonder why it isn’t at least a 1. And if we must (we must!) let us pick a name. Let that name be John Clarke.

It will be a “miss” that will live on in infamy. Even seasoned goal prevention officer Adam Tate had to look away with lip all a-quiver. I say “miss” rather than ‘miss’ because ‘miss’ implies ‘shot’ whereas here “miss” implies “action (or lack thereof) that garners awards for sportsmanship but for which the ‘D’ word is no longer adequate that we are forced to resort to ‘Chopper’ as in ‘of the Day’ but with a strong claim on ‘of the Season’”. No more words can do justice to the horror of it all so I won’t try. Best to ask the man himself because talking about it will be the only way to start the healing process. Welcome back to the 2s John.

Thanks to Jim Patterson for whistling and also for Robin Mitchell not delivering the change strip hence saving one lucky 2s member from shirt detail this week.

Thanks also to James Millar-Hogg (Roast, I believe?) and Jonny Green for tripling up over Regent, us and the 4s. Good work men.

PMB Man of the Match:  Chris Murray.

Report from Stevie Magee.